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Everyone has to make a living [Apr. 7th, 2013|06:47 pm]

I bought new needles to knit Rumplestiltskin dolls. I was going to get a size 3 because the stitches would be bigger and I guess that means less work, but then I got to the store and the size two needles were gold. So OBVIOUSLY I had to get those.  I think this will be my new career.

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Of Androids and Humans [Mar. 5th, 2013|11:34 pm]
So, I feel like talking, but I don't know what to say.  I'm a lot out of practice in talking about personal things.  Everything is either a funny picture or relating to Once Upon A Time.  But there has to be more to life.  There must be.

I have been listening to a show called RadioLab recently, and one episode focused on Artificial Intelligence. I made me think of this.  AIs are pretty rudimentary now.  You can program them to do so many things, very quickly, but you can't program one to have a decent conversation.  They can't choose except by logic.  They can't love.  Imagine, though, that one day robots advanced enough that they could do all these things.  That they were, in essence, human.  Even if that AI choose to do terrible things with their freedom, it doesn't change the miracle of what they are.  They're creator would still love them.  So that is how, in my perception, I see how God can love people who do evil.  Who choose evil.

Another thing - in the movie A.I., they do accomplish the feat of making robots that can love.  Only, they are programmed to imprint on one person.  A person that will die quickly in comparison to the robot - who will go on forever and ever, longing for something that is eternally lost.  So giving that robot a lifespan would be a mercy.  Like with humans.  We fear death, try and cheat it, think it's tragic - but is it, really?  Forgetting things as you get older, dying.  Perhaps they are all mercies.

If we were able to manufacture our own brand of human, would that make us gods?  As a Christian, I find this a tricky but interesting question.  As a species, we are low enough on the Science ladder that what we think we know changes daily.  In my opinion, it'll be a long time before that discussion could be had with any degree of certainty   And since I don't really care about arguing for the sake of it, I'm going to put this under the "who the fuck really knows" category.  As a Christian.
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Fatigue [Mar. 5th, 2013|11:01 pm]
Days have been flying by lately, but pretty long all the same.  I've felt consistently tired more than I can remember having been in my life.  I know I have two jobs now, but I've definitely been in that situation before.  Even days when I don't work both of them I'm tired.  It could be my diet, which has always been lacking... but it's ALWAYS been lacking, you know?  I hate to think this is me finally feeling my age.  I remember vaguely having bouts of energy in years past, which never happens anymore.  I struggled with depression for a few years, but that's past.  I've thought that maybe I'm sick. I've had reoccurring mono for a long time.  And when it happens it lasts for weeks or months.  If I go to the doctor the most they can do is charge me $200 for a blood test and tell me they can't do anything.  I'm wondering if the blood test would be positive whether I'm having an attack of it or not, since it never actually leaves the body.  I read about it once and mono is actually in the majority of people's blood, but only a small percentage ever experience symptoms, and an even smaller percentage have reoccurring attacks.  I guess I'm one of the lucky ones.

Or maybe I'm just getting old. :/ 
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Oh, Robert Carlyle, how am I blocked from your Twitter account? Let me count the ways! [Feb. 25th, 2013|04:20 pm]
[Tags|, ]

(A facetious list of occurrences of being blocked from Bobby's Twitter. Truly, it's only happened once.)

1. ?

This first occurrence is a mystery, but then so is Robert Carlyle.

2. @robertcarlyle_ People go to gyms for others reasons besides lifting you ignorant fuck.

So, I had a bet going with my friend K, the end result of which I had to find a certain number of things about Robert Carlyle that I didn't like. During my searching, I found a quote where he said "Guys, particularly in the West, go to the gym and train for hours and hours to pick up something that is heavier than them. Why would you want to do that?". I don't disagree. I find that veiny bulging look lifters cultivate disgusting - but I'm from the West, and I go to gyms. I got a little defensive, what can I say? (And frankly, it's ironic - considering two large gym chains near me are named after his characters - "The Rush" & "Gold's Gym". Are they actually named For his characters? Is that what the founders had in mind? I like to think so. Take that, Robert Carlyle.)

3. @robertcarlyle_ I like you as Rumplestiltskin best. You look better when you can't tell you're you.

Someone asked me what my favorite Robert Carlyle picture was.  I showed them one of him as Rumplestiltskin and they were surprised - "Don't you want pictures of the him underneath all that?".  No. No I don't.  I find him plenty attractive, but I like the leather & make up clad rock star look, what can I say? And I wasn't trying to be rude, I just wanted him to know what a bang up job the makeup department did.  Touchy guy.

4. @robertcarlyle_ Do you think there is a chance you'll ever go on a murdering spree?

This came from a conversation I had with my brother.

L: If I got a dog, I could name him Rumplestiltskin or Mr. Gold.
B: What about when you start to hate him? Then what will you do?
L: I might become less obsessed, but why would I hate him?
B: What if he started murdering people? In real life?
L: Let's cross that bridge if we come to it, shall we?

I just wanted to get ahead of the game. It doesn't hurt to ask and there are no stupid questions! That's what my teachers always told me.

5. @robertcarlyle_ My best friend thinks about you giving handjobs in a bathroom every time she goes to Biltmore.

I guess I get why this one is justifiable - but let's put it into context, shall we?

Another extension of the bet with K. She had to find things she appreciated about my crush. This doesn't exactly fall into the category of 'appreciate', but...

K: So, I have the audiobook of his you had me listen to on my phone. I had the shuffle mode for music turned on as we were driving to Biltmore.  In the moment when we rounded the corner, and I saw the majesty of the Biltmore mansion appear before me, a random chapter from that book came on, and it was your boy talking about jerking off another guy in a basement bathroom.  So now, my first memory of this beautiful house is always going to be narrated by his dirty bathroom sex in my head.

Is in context better? I don't know - but he's the one that narrated it.

6: @robertcarlyle_ One day, everyone will know you belong to me.

This had to do with the scene in "The Outsider" where Mr. Gold beat the ever-loving s**t out of Captain Hook. A good scene.

D: I thought of you when I saw that scene! So good.
L: You should always think of me whenever you see Rumplestiltskin.  It's my goal for everyone to do so. I messaged him to say that one day everyone will know he belongs to me. And that was the sixth time I was blocked from Robert Carlyle's Twitter account.
D: I kind of hope you're not kidding.

7: @robertcarlyle_ It's me again, Carlyle. What the fuck is this?

A little while back, Mr. Carlyle did a series of Twitter Q&As.  After asking 25 times, he answered my query about what his favorite books were. He said "i only read scripts nowadays..".  He could have mentioned books he'd liked in the past, or even better, say he wasn't really inclined to read books at all - which I only discovered later, after much questing.  Anyways, during my search I became quite obsessed with finding examples of him reading books.  In one episode of Hamish Macbeth, he's sitting on a couch with a Louis L'Amour novel, but I never could make out the cover.  K suggested I take a picture of it and ask him about it via Twitter. So I did.

8: @robertcarlyle_ I have a bath and hand towel set embroidered with your likeness.

I thought he would be flattered!


This probably won't be the last time.  I'm going to have so many bogus/abandoned Twitter accounts by the time this is done, not to mention email addresses.
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B-log? Blog? What is that? [Nov. 11th, 2012|02:53 am]
Someone asked me if I had a blog today, and I said yes - because I do. I have since ages.  However, what I most currently post to now is tumblr - and short conversation snippets and pictures that (mostly) refer to Robert Carlyle does not a blog make.  I don't like the forced curt loudness of facebook, but I find I have fallen prey to it regardless.  I can't remember the last time I typed out a long entry.

So I'm back here.  I don't know that anyone will see this, but at least it'll give me a place to write things that aren't solely meant to amuse.  

What am I doing?  I'm slowly slowly getting back into sewing.  Only now most of the characters I make have been female.  WHAT DOES IT MEAN???

Also, I hardly watch anime anymore.  Live TV has been making quite the comeback -- a lot of good programming is on, and maybe that's the only reason.  Once Upon A Time is my obsession at the moment.  

I also have two jobs now, which doesn't leave a lot of free time.  I clean at a school/church four nights a week, plus my regular job that I've had for almost a decade now.  I was mostly wasting my time anyways - now I use it to make money. So, great!  

I want to read more books, but it's hard... I read a lot but it's ALL been fanfiction, which is nearly impossible to quantify.  I finally wrote a lengthy fanfic of my own - and finished it to boot!  

Right now I'm baking a cake - going to make a 3-tier cake to take to our holiday meeting and decorate it like a Christmas tree.  I took classes.  I got this.

So, I've had a rough couple of years... but I finally feel like hope is in my life again. That life is in my life again, if you will.  I don't know what the future holds, but things are looking up - I just feel it.  If I don't fuck it up. Again.  If only life could be lived without that possibility I think everything would just be better.  
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My Little Brony [Aug. 19th, 2012|05:59 am]
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OK: I had this really gay moment yesterday

L: I’m not surprised.  

OK: ...... I had just finished watching Season 2 of My Little Pony…

L: And then you had sex with a man?

OK: ……

L: Because that would be a pretty gay moment.

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It is finished. [Aug. 19th, 2012|05:58 am]
(Call of Cthulhu RPG)

OK: So, you’re in town again. The chapel and the grocers are the only two buildings you haven’t been to yet.

L: I go into the chapel.

OK: It’s Sunday morning so the priest is conducting a small service.

L: Afterwards, I go talk to the priest.

OK: Alright. He’s a young man, probably in his early 20s you guess.

L: Robert Carlyle portrayed a priest in one movie. I’m going to imagine it’s him.

OK: This priest is too young to be him.

L: It’s too late.

OK: He doesn’t look like Robert Carlyle!

L: It’s done.

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Reasons I press the sleep button on my alarm [Aug. 16th, 2012|02:07 am]

1. I’m very tired

2. I need to deliver a book to the house with the glass ceiling so I can get a tire rotation, and it’s Important.


“Whatcha watching?”
“The Dr. Rush Show.”
(looks at tv) “Is that Stargate Universe?” 
“That’s what I said.”

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Cthulhu and other dark creatures [Aug. 14th, 2012|11:27 am]

OK: I figured you could pattern your Cthulhu character after Mr. Gold.

L: Mmm. I’d like to. He does have an old school feel to him doesn’t he?

L: ::feels:: Yeah.

OK: He does. I could picture him as a Scottish gentleman from 1920 that owns a curiosity shop.

L: Hahahaha me too! Crazy. We are so in sync.

OK: Perv.  He needs a leather trenchcoat and a fedora.

L: Hmm. No. A hat would only cover his beautiful hair.

OK: Maybe not the fedora.  What if it rains?

L: He has an emergency poncho.

OK: They have ponchos in the 1920s?

L:  Maybe it’s a ‘curiosity’. Ever Thought About That?

L: Anyway, I thought this was an alternate universe.

OK: To a degree it is. 

L: “But not to the degree that emergency ponchos exist! Be Real for once!”

OK: There may be mystical entities from beyond time and space bound and determined to destroy your mind and steal your soul, but no - there are no plastic ponchos.

L: Did I say it was plastic? It’s treated cotton or something.

OK: Treated with what? Wax? 

L: Lanolin, obviously.

OK: Obviously. I mean, I knew that.

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Sewing + Drinking = [Aug. 14th, 2012|11:18 am]
[Current Mood |drunkdrunk]

L: I found my gold scissors! They were in the strangest place… HEY! I’M GOING TO NAME THE SCISSORS MR. GOLD! I’M GONNA MAKE A LABEL!!! 


K: Hahaha oh shit

L: I found them in a bag in my trunk. Just like what I wanna do with the real Mr. Gold.  Wait what

K: That’s crazy hot

L: Is it? I thought it sounded insane.

L: Oh wait. It’s You.

K: Whatever maaan.

L: To expound on my “fantasy”… I’ll put him in a bag in my trunk. Naked. I’ll wear his clothes.  Take his cane. Use polyjuice potion to impersonate him. 

L: “Why, Mr. Gold - you’ve never been a drinker.”

L: “We all do what we can to get by, dearie. If you’ll excuse me, Please.”

K: Haha ok now it sounds insane. Good work.

L: Woo! I win the GOLD medal for insane fantasy!

L: “At first all I did was take Gold again and again in the darkness of the basement.  He begged to be released.  Sometimes for escape, and sometimes for the more sensual kind.  But soon, it wasn’t enough.  I wanted to take every part of his life.  I remember the look in his eyes the day I donned his suit, and stared back at him with his own face.  ”Mr. Gold - you’ve been away a long time. I think Belle will be… overjoyed to see you again.” 

K: Whoa.

L: Haha


L: MAN!!! Bleach only works when you don’t want it to! When ur like “BLEACH! Make this white!” It’s like “No.”

K: Bitch ass bleach.

L: Fuckin bleach

L: Then when you’re carryin bleach with plans of adding it to your WHITE LOAD… it’s like “Imma leak on your stuff and leave spots.”

(later, again)

“That cuts, Mr. Gold. It cuts deep.”

(“So, how do you keep your scissors so sharp?” “Oh, I just keep losing them. If I never use it it keeps it’s edge longer.” “…..”)

(And that is my Belle bodice he’s resting on.)

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